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Therapy for some reason can be a bit of a taboo subject, which only goes to show some of the issues we have within society. It is perfectly natural to meet your need for water when you identify your thirst, perfectly natural to eat when we feel hungry. So why do we neglect our emotional, psychological and mental needs? Every day we are bombarded by adverts asking us to give in to our cravings for food and drink, encouraging us to spend money... why is the same consideration not given to the thing that will really help us grow and develop?


So, who are the types of people who need support? Spoiler alert - everyone! Sometimes I find it quite surprising when a new client reaches out and before they've even told me why they are coming to therapy they are already apologising for their need for support. ''It's no big deal'' ''There are bigger problems in the world than mine'' ''I haven't had it that bad''

''Other people deal with things like this all the time''

The truth is that comparison can serve a purpose sometimes, when we need a role model to follow or to give us some context so that we don't make a problem bigger than it is, but don't use comparison as a reason to not seek support or to beat yourself up.


All clients are unique, their stories, experiences and journeys are all special. They are special. But their problems are not. It's true that whatever issues you are facing there are so many other people experiencing the same thing. There are also so many other people who have overcome those same problems.

Below is a list of a few examples of circumstances that people are dealing with every day, and who have recognised their need for support from a professional to help them navigate their circumstances: *All of these are real case studies which have been anonymised


A man in his 60's who has recently lost his mother and is dealing with his grief, and also the complexities of dealing with the will and the estate with his siblings. The death of an elder in the family can often cause catastrophic fall-out, and change the culture of their family forever. For some reason even if clear plans have been made with regards to how to split assets and money, money causes a huge issue with family. As do all of the feelings around fairness and how much family members have done in the past to 'deserve' a share of the assets. This particular client had great difficulty in navigating how to organise going through his mother's house and possessions, and sharing the labour between his two brothers, one of whom had lived distantly from the family due to his involvement with substance abuse. How do you figure out who is responsible for which tasks when you all live in other cities? How do you deal with your emotions around having to deal with an estranged brother who followed a different path to you? How do you feel about the division of assets between you and your brothers when you feel like you've been there for your Mother more than anyone? How do you deal with your emotions around losing your mother during all of that? You don't have to know all of the answers to these questions, you're not expected to. But you can certainly figure it all out with the help of a professional. This client was treated with Counselling to deal with bereavement and emotional difficulties.


A mother of three who has spent the last seven years being a stay-at-home mum to young children. Now she is considering going back in to the working world and is experiencing severe anxiety around finding a new place in the world and also in leaving her children. She is faced with leaving her comfort zone, finding a new identity outside of being a mother, and feelings of guilt and loss about spending less time with her children. All of these feelings are so natural, and nobody should have to experience the emotional and physical difficulties brought up by this alone. This client was treated with Counselling to help her navigate her feelings and learn about stress management. She also had hypnotherapy for help with self-esteem, anxiety-reduction and relaxation.


A man in his 30's who was experiencing relationship difficulties due to his drinking and anger issues. His partner felt that he wasn't investing in their relationship or valuing her place in his life, and he used drinking as a form of escapism to deal with his stress, which was causing more problems in his life. This client's anger actually came from a lot of repressed emotions he had around his childhood and family, that he had never processed or dealt with because he didn't know how to - nobody had ever showed him. Therefore he had unhealthy coping strategies that were actually causing more problems than they were solving. It took ongoing Counselling to help this client to deal with the past, and help limit the damage he was creating in his own life by adopting better coping strategies and dealing with his emotions. This then improved his relationships with his girlfriend, family and friends. He also learnt how to manage his money better due to a better relationship with socialising, and saw an improvement in his career.


I use these examples to show that we all have problems in life, and that we don't have all the answers but seeking support can help you find some of the answers and feel supported and encouraged along the way. If you are thinking about seeking support then please know that there is no shame in it, and great things come at the other end of your therapeutic journey.

Make sure that the professional you choose is fully insured and registered with a professional council such as National Council of Psychotherapists, Directory of Counsellors or the UK Council of Psychotherapists. Being a member of a professional organisation ensures that your Therapist has been trained to a high standard, adhere to continuing professional development and are supervised by a qualified Supervisor.


I hope that you have found this blog helpful today. I am always happy to answer questions so please do get in touch. Take care,

Hester

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